it is hot in india.

it's here.
it's official.
the fun is over.

the single most dreaded word in subcontinental english is...

summer.

but,
there is always an up side...

knuckleduster's list of the 5 best things about summer in india.

1. it's borderline acceptable to wear linen pajamas on all occasions.
we do ask that you show some restraint.

2. the sense of satisfaction we all feel if
we actually accomplish something that requires going outside.

3. the flipside to #2.

it is a perfectly reasonable excuse to accomplish nothing at all.

no one will argue.

everyone will just nod and look away,
too hot to contribute more...

4. the word sultry.

today's forecast...

"a warm clear sky on a dry and sultry day.
the night will be warm and uncomfortable if there is a power cut."

not burning, blazing, baking, scorching,
blistering, searing, sizzling, broiling, scalding,
or even hot...

sultry.

i wish they would take it a step further...

"the air today will be moist and full of virility.
this evening will bring a delicious mixture of both sweet and salt,
with the possible notion of a vigorous drizzle.
bring your rubbers."

a bit creepy but a morale booster nonetheless.

which brings me to #5....

5. whereas the rest of the year it is a bit of a turn-off...

during the summer,

you're expected to sweat profusely during sex.

i know this seems like an unusual show of optimism coming from canepari
but don't you worry,
another list will follow soon enough.

redrum.

and another one.

an oldie but goodie.
my first major for T.I.M.E.
grocery supply chain on indian t.i.m.e.
sort of a boring subject, i admit,
but,
that would be your problem??

...

INDIAN SUPERMARKET

As the economy continues to expand, a sort of retail revolution has been taking place in the grocery business of India. With the enormous and rapid growth of the middle and upper class, the demand for quality food products and cleaner, modern retail spaces has also expanded. Most shops in India recieve their produce after it has been circulated through a series of middlemen, or mandis, which results in increased prices and decreased quality. Some estimate 30% of all produce is spoiled or lost before it even reaches the market. But major corporations like Reliance Industries are attempting to modernize the industry but streamlining the supply chain, modernizing the processing facilities and upgrading to more contemporary retail spaces. By working directly with the farmers, organizing all transportation, creating high-end processing warehouses and opening a chain of clean, modern retail spaces, the infrastructure for success is growing.

knuckleduster's new motto...

"its better than nothing"

indians do it better. part 1.

found this 8.5 by eleven for sale in old delhi.
10 rupees later it is yours...

haven't got a clue as to its purpose

but whatever it is,
i want to be involved.

obviously it is pretty fucking cool to have a goat head or tiger head
and
still be able to look smart in a pinstripe tie,
but
what is even more alluring,
to me at least,
is the other man in the blue suit.
dude's friend/colleague/nemesis just metamorphed right in front of him,
and he didn't even flinch.
he just sat there looking dapper.
cool as a cucumber.
i sort of love him.
so i've dubbed him.
he now goes by the moniker...

larry legend.

boom.
knuckleduster.
"we are elitists."

knuckle up.

listen.

i'm trying.
i know this has been dissapointing for you.
its been dissapointing for me.
and trying on my patience.
and sapping of my energy.
and wearing on my last.
and painful to the point of...

but fuck it.
better late than never.
and i have an excuse.
i've been preparing.
i wanted to be thorough.
and that took time.
but here it is...

each week(maybe).
1 small body of work.
with a legit explanation.
none of canepari's nonsensical.
clear.
concise.
too the point.

ready.set.go.

this week.
City of Widows.
vrindivan, india.

Vrindavan,
in the north Indian state of Uttar Pradesh
is called the ‘City of Widows’.

This is where upper-caste Hindu widows,
disowned by their families,
come to live.
Young or old,
they spend their days singing hymns in temples,
in exchange for which they get some food
and a mere 15 cents a day.

Unifem estimates there are 15,000 widows in Vrindivan,
and despite the aid of the government and NGOs,
the number appears to be growing.

read/listen to more about Vrindivan
here
or
here.

the pleasure was mine.

canepari digs a ditch...

and guess who's going in it??

weak inner ear.

stop thinking about carrottop.
stop thinking about carrottop.
stop thinking about carrottop.

i am getting desperate.
carrottop haunts my dreams.
i had to google "sweet innocent kittens" to counteract.
and now i can't stop thinking of the demon kitten on the left.
fuck me.

mirrorface

what the fuck happened here??

whats a girl to do???

this has to be the world's coolest bicycle gang.

fuck brooklyn.

canepari gets lockjaw.

i can't believe i'm about to do this...
it feels so wrong.
it just isn't me.

but i'm trying...
(too hard??)
to turn a new leaf...

here we go...

i am sorry.
i haven't been there for you.
i have been lazy
and
i have been uninspired.
my selfishness has been ruthless
and
my vanity has been a virus.
i i i i i i i...

you get the gist.

i'll try harder.

or maybe i won't.

mind your own business.

canepari.

david o. russel was right.

fuck it.
i'm now a voting republican.
it's obviously more fun.

proof is in the pudding...

huckabee gets a shoeshine from a black man.
huckabee and chuck norris!
amazing.

the word you're looking for is "regift".

huckabee mesmerizes.

our world is a fantastic and weird place.

we all should embrace its dysfunction and smile at it ridiculosity.
huckabee for president in 2008!
yeah god!